Loss

Losing someone or something you love is hard.

It can be an extremely painful process, and you may experience all kinds of emotions and physical reactions.

Grief can be strong feeling of sadness. It can also make you feel lonely, frightened or angry – you can even feel mad at the person who left you or died. You can feel this way about a person you love, your pet dying, or a loved one moving away.

There’s no right or wrong way to feel your loss – whatever you feel is OK – and it’s different for each person. You may: 

• feel like crying or not want to cry at all
• want to be alone, or want to stay close to family or friends
• not want to talk much
• find it hard to do your school work
• feel more angry or frustrated than you usually do
• have bad dreams or find it hard to sleep
• feel lonely
• feel worried because other people are sad too

Losing someone you love is really hard. But there are people who want to help you and things you can do that may help. You could try:

• Asking questions – It’s always OK to ask questions about things you don’t understand or find confusing. Talk to an adult you trust – someone who will listen to you and give you answers. 
• Spending time with friends or whānau – Share your thoughts, feelings, and memories with each other. Look at photos and talk about the person who died – what you’ll miss about them.
• Finding a way to say goodbye – write a letter or poem, draw a picture, or speak about the person or sing a favourite song.